How foolish I've been. Solved everything a month ago by reverting to v1.28 as advised by this forum and ignoring update prompts to update to v1.30 every time the PC restarts. Today, however, I fell for the old 'your software is out of date' prompt and updated to v1.31. And guess what - that crashed instantly too. So back to trustworthy v1.28 again.
I have no idea what test machines Thermaltake use to stress test their software, but they aren't Windows 10. This is crazy.